The wait is coming down to the wire and as the time for possible travel gets closer, my mind has been racing. There are a litany of things that have run through my head as we prepare to leave the country to go get our little girl that is waiting for us 7,000 miles away. Probably the most difficult part of this process by far, will be leaving Wyatt for 2 weeks. The reality of that is beginning to sink in and since we haven't left him for as much as an overnight, the thought has been burdening me lately. As crazy as this might sound, I'm going to be brutally honest...I keep thinking to myself, is he going to think we've abandoned him? 2 weeks is a long time when you are 13 months and all you do is play, eat and sleep :) Lots of praying surrounding saying bye-bye to our little man for 14 days.
When I think of Hadley right now, I can't help but walk through what her life has been like for the last 16 months...our little girl, an ocean away, has never known or understood what it's like to have a mommy and daddy...Those are words that are very likely foreign to her. She doesn't know what it's like to have someone tuck her in at night, hug her or hold her when she's scared, protect her and look out for her, comfort her when she's sad and lonely, greet her in the morning with a smile when she wakes up, have a brother to play with, a full tummy all of the time, unconditional love and affection, family, parents and most importantly the opportunity to know Jesus Christ! Wow! All of these things I am ashamed to say and I dare say, I have grown so accustomed to. All of these blessings many of us have known since birth....All of these things she has likely never experienced. All of those things that she has never known or experienced have been HER NORMAL for the last 16 months. Boy is life about to change! She is about to have a FAMILY and doesn't even realize it yet! God bless and prepare her little heart and mind as she waits these remaining few weeks for us to get there!
Hugs and love,
Robin
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Hi Robin...thank you for sharing your heart! Wyatt will miss you, but will be in great hands & probably will be spoiled every second while you are away. I can't even imagine all of your emotions right now, especially the excitement of meeting your little girl for the first time. Oh, it brings tears to my eyes! Thinking of you lots! :)
ReplyDeleteThe good thing about all of this is that all of these emotions you are having are probably only affecting you, long term. Wyatt is so young. I am sure he will miss you while you are gone, but he'll have the love of whomever you entrust to care for him and, in the long run, he won't remember that you left him. Hadley is also very young. She likely will not remember her time in the orphanage or what it was like to "not" have a family. Very fortunate for everyone!
ReplyDeleteWhen our daughter, who is almost 6, talks about her time in the orphanage or the plane ride to America, it is almost comical! She'll tell us about sitting on the plane and singing songs with her Mimi and Bop and Zayde (her grandparents, none of whom traveled with us). She talks about the nannies in China who just had too many babies to care for. (A lot of what she says comes from story books we've read, not actual memories.) Everything will be fine. The trip will be an awesome experience and you'll be back home with Hadley and Wyatt together before you know it! Best of luck!